User blog comment:Mara the Marine Marauder/Diary Discussions/@comment-131.246.191.250-20150803082055/@comment-25369681-20150805121804

Social life is ok - all my friends and acquaintances (and family, of course) are very nice and helpful. At the moment, I stay in contact with rather few people - there are more old friends and family members I could phone or meet more often, but I don't really find the time for that, it would only add extra stress. The amount (and quality) of social life is good as it is.

As for getting help from them with cleaning - there's no one I'd want to burden with that. It wouldn't help in the long run either - I got to get a grip on maintaining a reasonable state in my home myself. I've already talked with several people about the topic, and about the fact that it always takes me longer than anyone else I know - they never had any advice that really helped either. I've done things like dishwashing with other people - no matter whether I wash or dry, I'm always the slower one - but no one could ever spot an obvious reason why, except that I "do it thoroughly". Which, at the moment, is actually a good thing because I should keep things hygienic because of my weakened immune system. I've also hung up laundry together with other people, and folded laundry with other people watching - same thing there. It takes me longer but no one can see an obvious reason why, except that I "do it thoroughly". I've tried doing it more sloppily but somehow that just doesn't work or leads to extra work (for example, clothes have too many creases later and need to be ironed - which I almost never do otherwise). I've looked in the internet about various "life hacks" (yes, I've seen the 2-second-t-shirt-folding method on youtube) and old-fashioned household advice (yes, I know it's better to clean a room from the top downwards than the other way round, and most of the other basic things) and systems (yes, I've tried Fly Lady). I've googled the average time "normal" people spend on household chores (usually on sites that point out the time difference between women and men, or between today and a few decades ago - but helpful for me to see what's actually average and "normal"). Somehow the only thing that seems to help is to read less about it (especially since I hardly find anything about the topic anymore that's new to me) and do more, and just keep going. That's mostly also true for Habitica guilds with related topics - I get more done when I stop reading too much chat and joining too many challenges there, and just do my stuff and click the household-related tasks I already have. (Though sometimes it helps to vent there a little. :} )

No, it's not illness-related - but it's an ongoing topic and problem for me. Maybe one illness-related aspect of it is that whatever chronic problems you have before cancer will add up to the new ones you encounter during cancer, and will get in the way when trying to deal with them. People who get most of their chronic problems solved before cancer (or any difficult new situation) will have an easier time dealing with the new situation.

Thanks for asking and for your suggestions though!